Tired of constantly falling in and out with the journey to success? Can’t seem to stick to the plans of your ultimate goals? Not able to achieve your goals even after putting in all the efforts?
If this is you, you are not alone. I have been guilty of the same in the past. However, I overcame this phase [Yes, it’s a phase that almost everyone goes through] and in today’s blog post, I want to share how you can get over it as well!
Some think that successful people are born with all the talent and are destined to be successful. Though this is true to some extend, there is another truth that is very less accepted,
Everyone is born with a talent but your success lies on how you utilize it.
So, this clears one thing – If every individual is born with talents, then that makes everyone ordinary and there is no such thing as extraordinary.
But I know you are not completely convinced by this because there must be something that creates a huge difference between successful people and unsuccessful ones.
So, I decided to compile 5 elements that, I personally think, leads to success.
Cultivate the Right Mindset
An average human gets around 6,200 thoughts in a day and naturally, these thoughts are responsible for our overall happiness, success, and even failures.
Needless to say, If our mind is crowded with negativities, our thoughts will also be negative and this, in turn, will cause stress and anxiety.
The negativity does not always have to be a bad friendship or stress. It can also be the type of mindset we maintain.
According to Carol Dweck, there are 2 types of mindset – Growth Mindset and Fixed Mindset.
A growth mindset is when a person believes that they can improve their skill through hard work and dedication.
They know that an individual born with talent needs to polish it from time to time.
Fixed Mindset is when a person cultivates limiting belief. They maintain a notion that their talents and qualities will always remain the same and cannot be improved.
In order to be successful, you obviously need to develop a growth mindset. This is not only necessary to have mental peace, but it is vital to materialize our life goals too.
Our mind influences our circumstances and this in turn influences of life. You can read more about it here.
Book Suggestion: As a man Thinketh
Discipline is the key to success
I believe that tricking yourself into getting things done is a quick fix. The permanent solution to stay focused and productive is Discipline.
And this cannot be achieved until we control our emotions and learn to practice delayed gratification. This has made me arrive at the conclusion that the core aim of discipline is self-control.
Though I have written a detailed blog post on the ways to master discipline, I wanna share 4 important factors of discipline that, if followed, leads to success.
- Just get started [Don’t wait for the right time]
- Stay Consistent [Even when life throws stones at you]
- Focus more on internal motivation
- Say more ‘No’ than ‘Yes’
Though all 4 of these are equally important, I emphasize the most on the ‘getting started’ part.
This is because, No matter how many articles you read and videos you watch, If you don’t get started, you will not progress.
But as a human we all have days when we feel lazy and unmotivated to work.
On such days you can use Pomodoro Technique, where you set a timer for 25 minutes and work interruptedly for straight 25 minutes and then you take a 5 minutes break.
[I personally use this only to get into the momentum in the initial stages.]
You can use this technique according to your own convenience.
For instance, instead of setting the timer for 25 minutes, You can set the timer for 40 minutes, 50 minutes, etc.
You can read more about it, here.
Right goal setting is crucial to success
Goals and strategies are important, but how you set your goals and strategies is even more important. There are 5 important elements to it. You can memorize it easily as S.M.A.R.T.
To explain this more elaborately, Suppose you want to learn German.
Simply ‘wanting’ to get better at German is not enough. You need to be specific with it.
For instance, instead of setting ‘I want to get better at German’ as your goal, you can set ‘I will learn the basics of German’
You need a way to track your progress, so make your path measurable.
You can do this by testing yourself weekly on Language apps such as Duolingo [It’s 100% free, not sponsored].
Recording the weekly scores will help you understand how well you are learning the language.
Goals that are too challenging can overwhelm you and make you quit; Goals that are too easy may not satisfy you in the long-term.
Start by setting goals that are moderately difficult and motivate you to do more. Once you start achieving them, slowly raise the bar.
The goals that you set should be reasonable and related to your career choices. Focus on things that align you with your future goals.
If your ultimate goal is to become fluent in German for XYZ reason, try not indulge yourself in learning other new languages simultaneously.
As this will not only confuse you, but consume much of your time.
The goals without a deadline are unlikely to be completed, because your mind knows that there is clearly no urgency in finishing it.
The less and right amount of time you allot yourself for a task, the more time you create for other meaningful tasks.
The reason why setting goals is important is because it gives us a reason and emotion to work towards our goals.
And when we have emotions linked to our goals, we try our level best to achieve them. Our goals propel us forward when we are going though a tough phase.
Always be a student
I’m pretty sure that almost every one of us has been told that if we want to be successful, we need to get a good education.
And so, some of us have grown up equating learning with formal education, when in reality, it is a life-long process.
Learning is not merely confined to studies, and developing new skills, but it also includes developing new perspectives.
So, the question is, how do you cultivate the habit of constantly learning new things?
I. Read More
I know some of you are cringing right now, but there are seriously many benefits to reading.
The reason why many people hate reading books is because they tend to choose the wrong books. Always pick a book that deeply interests you.
If you are a beginner then I would suggest you to fiddle around with different genres for sometime and then shortening down to the genre that interests you.
There are books available on almost all the topics on the earth. I personally prefer using Goodreads to choose my books. It’s 100% free and not sponsored at all.
If you don’t have the time to read a complete book, then you can either read their summary online or you can even read random blog posts.
II. Hate Reading? Listen to podcasts
If you don’t have the time to read books or if you can’t seem to read books no matter how hard you try, try listening to podcasts.
Again, you get to choose the genre but because this is relatively new, you won’t have much genre choices.
III. Analyse where you went wrong
Instead of judging yourself for your past mistakes, try to learn from them. Easier said than done, I know. But, this perspective is way better for your mental health than beating yourself up.
I have committed tonnes of embarrassing mistakes in the past, but with all honesty, I am glad that I made those mistakes because they shaped me into who I am today.
If I would have never made any mistakes in life and been a straight A-student since childhood, I could have never ever started this blog because I would have had no knowledge on the topic!
This is the main reason why people say that forgiving yourself is the first step to self-care.
You must have guessed the bonus tip by the image – Delayed Gratification. I talk a lot about it on my blog, so you can make out how important this tip is.
Delayed Gratification is the skill of controlling yourself by not giving into the immediate temptation in the hope of gaining a better reward.
For instance, limiting the use of social media to study more and get better marks in the upcoming exam.
So, the question is, does it really work?
Yes, it has been proven by a study called – The Stanford Marshmellow Experiment.
But, even bigger question is,
why do we find it so difficult to wait?
It is quite difficult to answer because it all boils down to trust and certainty which differs from person to person.
For some, the long-term rewards may not be that charming and certain as the short-term ones. And for others, perhaps they are not much invested in their long-term plans.
Either way, we all have a purpose in this world, and in order to fulfill our life purpose, we may need to master delayed gratification.
The best way to do it is by starting small.
You can start off by avoiding the temptation of small stuff, like resisting the urge to watch porn, or waiting 5 extra minutes to use social media.
Eventually, you can start applying this to your work. For instance, you can work for extra 5 minutes after finishing your work session.
The bottom line is – try to resist the urge as much as you can.
If you liked my post, and feel that it has influenced you positively, share it with your significant others too!
Thanx for reading.